In Defense of the Nice Guy

Nice guys finish last. Right?  This is widely known. Us girls, we say we want a nice guy, but honestly, nice guys just finish last. ‘I’ve dated SO MANY jerks‘ I think to myself, ‘I just want someone NICE.’ But then…I meet someone nice. So nice. So sweet, so honest, no games, no bullshit, nothing. Just honest to goodness niceness. And do I end up liking him? Am I attracted to him? Do I want him to push me up against the wall and rip my cami apart (could he even push me up against a wall and rip a cotton shirt open?!?)? No. Nope. Not at all. And I know I am not the only girl thinking this. Us women, we want it all. We say we want a nice guy, and we meet a guy who seems sooooooo nice…and maybe he is. Kind of. Or maybe he’s just so attractive that we look over all the jerk-y shit and say “omigod, he’s SO nice!” But, all that attractiveness tends to make us blind to the not-so-nice-guy shit that creeps up on you.

Case in point? Jake Ryan. Y’all, I LOVE me some Jake Ryan. I grew up loving Jake Ryan. What a delicious, sweet, nice guy he is! Ask any woman within five years of me and she LOVES Jake Ryan. Ultimate “nice guy”, right? But…Is he? Sure, Jake Ryan shows up for Sam at the church and gives her a birthday cake and maybe they have a wonderful night…but you know what? Jake Ryan flat out pimps his girlfriend out to a kid he doesn’t even know in order to go pursue greener (younger) pastures. Sure, his girlfriend was a damn greedy, social climbing bitch, but does that make it okay to pass her on to a random boy while she’s passed out? NO. If a guy who wasn’t as sexy as Jake Ryan did that he would just be a damn jerk! Meanwhile, the guy that Jake’s girlfriend is drunkenly passed off to, sweet little Farmer Ted, is a true nice guy. Yes, maybe he drives over to his friend’s house to take a picture to commemorate this wild night, but he never does anything untoward to her. Damn you, Farmer Ted, you are a true nice guy. But how many girls watch 16 Candles and swoon and dream about Farmer Ted? He is truly the nice guy in this movie and sure enough, he is finishing last in the viewer’s hearts. He comes up second behind Jake Ryan, but why?

Is this the female version of lady on the street, freak on the streets? Are we just as bad as men? YES. We are.

And you know what? When guys screw us over and throw us off to some random guy to go running after their Sam leaving us to wonder ‘Why?!? Why am I getting screwed over by a jerk again?’ well it is because we keep choosing jerks, damnit! I for one am so guilty of this. I say I’m sick of bullshit and jerks and douchebags, etc etc…but so far, if I meet a nice guy and a not so nice guy at the same time, guess who I end up seeing a few more times? Yep. You know who.

So here I am. I am owning up to this. I pick the bad boys, the jerks, the guys that are smooth enough to gloss over all their douchey ways. But no more! I am ready for the Farmer Ted. I’m ready to let a nice guy finish first (or at least finish second. A nice guy would never finish before me, right?!).


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