And so it returns!
Yesterday I went to see The Conjuring with one of my aunts. I know this movie isn’t everyone’s idea of a good time, but me? I LOVE scary movies. There’s always those first 15 minutes of the movie where I really regret walking into the theatre because it’s dark and I just know something terrible is about to happen on the giant screen in front of me. But I quickly get over it for the entertainment value. Scary movies often make me laugh because of the mass quantities of corn syrup-y blood or ridiculous looking demons and I have a hard time imagining these things truly scare anyone. But then I remember, everyone has something that scares them. Most fears are rational and justifiable- losing loved ones, failing, being alone- you know, those big fears that plague most of us, including me. But fear can come in many forms, even if it’s something irrational, like fake blood being splattered across a screen in a manner in which would probably never happen in real life (I mean, being terrorized by razor toothed fish? Yeah, I’m looking at your Piranha…). So here are those irrational fears for me…
I highly doubt this is really an irrational fear since so many people are terrified of these makeup heavy, red wigged wearing creeps. No explanation needed here. Just SCARY.
I know, people usually get over this when they’re like eight years old. But for me, it just kind of got worse. Luckily, in a movie theatre the film usually provides enough light to keep me from totally freaking out. But while I’m in bed at night, if the room is too dark for me to not be able to make out everything in it, I usually have to pull out my phone and start perusing the web or something on it or have my kindle out just so the light from it keeps me from getting too anxious. Oh, and making a trip to the bathroom in the middle of the night? Better believe the lights get turned on in every room I have to go through to get to it, and even weirder? I’m holding my breath until I can get those light switches flipped on. I’m. A. Wuss.
I’m walking down the street, and someone stabs me. Yes, for years I have been terrified of that randomly happening. I know this one weirds people out when I tell them, which could be why I never really make it a point to bring it up (picture me and my finally found Jake Ryan clone on our third date and me dropping the ‘oh yeah, I’m just super terrified of being stabbed, no big deal’ bomb…). I think most people, in general, don’t like the idea of ever being stabbed, but they probably don’t actively fear it. But here’s the deal, many years ago I had a nightmare. I don’t remember the details, but I remember this… my sister was next to me and for some reason she took out a knife and stabbed me in the thigh. Not like viciously or anything, she just did it like it was an everyday occurrence, so in a way the nightmare was kind of (darkly) funny. What wasn’t funny was waking up and remembering what it felt like when that knife pierced my skin. Seriously, that part was terrifying.
Okay, and for something a little less dark and twisted…
The Bottom of the Lake
I can’t even. Y’all, I just can’t deal. The bottom of the ocean kind of terrifies me as well, but for some reason, a lake is just too much. And for as much as I LOVE being out on the lake, this is kind of a problem. The water is dark, you can’t see through it, you have no idea what’s down there…for all you know lurking under all that mud could be DEAD BODIES. Animal bodies, fish bodies, HUMAN BODIES. And your feet could just be there, touching them. AGHHHH! I’m having a physical response to this thought as I type it. Utterly horrifying.
So there you have it, dear readers. You know now all the ways to scare the bajeezus out of me. Now what scares the bajeezus out of you?